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Having only just returned from a most eventful road tripping experience (Durban to Cape Town via the garden route), I consider myself somewhat mildly qualified to write this piece. It must, however, be said that this trip was undertaken as novices and by two young girls with only a vague idea of what they were getting themselves into. What follows is a list of lessons learned, the hardest possible way.

1. Hire a vehicle

This may seem like an obvious assumption. Needless to say, we did not. The Opel Corsa Sport that we made (most of) the trip in did not take kindly to this decision and proceeded to call it a day somewhere in Knysna. Comically (only in retrospect), the car literally blew a gasket. The head gasket to be exact. I should add that this is a grave diagnosis, one sure to put the spanner in the works of a road trip. My limited (read: pathetic) knowledge regarding cars did not extend to gaskets and their existence let alone their function. My newly acquired knowledge regarding gaskets does not extend much further either. (See Wikipedia for elaborate confusion.)

I might add at this point for the benefit of those who are familiar with gaskets and their “blowing” potential that the car did not overheat at any point and that regular oil and water checks were done.

2. Do not take on the potholes

I don’t think it necessary to mention the province we were driving in when we encountered the potholes, 90-odd kilometres in pot-hole ridden country later, we found ourselves with a flat, nay a burst, tyre. Not surprisingly, attempts to avoid potholes by swerving are largely unsuccessful where the potholes outsize the actual road. Thumbs up, however, to the excellent signage: “Potholes! 10 km.” followed by an identical sign nearly 20km later. The sad thing though is that while amazing tourist opportunities exist beyond these roads, I don’t doubt that they are often missed because the roads to them are paved with well, that’s just it, they’re not really well-paved. Lesson: do not take on the potholes, you will not win.

3. Learn how to change a tyre

Perhaps it is no surprise that many of the lessons learned by two girls on a road trip have a constant theme relating to cars. I admit, though, that we have no excuse for this one. We should know how to change a tyre. No doubt that such skills are handy when one is roadside in the Eastern Cape with nothing around but cows and grass. The damsel in distress bit doesn’t work too well when nobody is around to see it.

4. Get a credit card

Sounds largely inappropriate in this list, I know, but trust me when I say that possibilities for its use (not abuse) do exist while on holiday. Those sadistic head gaskets and their distasteful timing may leave you without a vehicle, rendering car hire more of a necessity than a preference. Enter credit card.

5. Get a GPS navigator/accurate map

I haven’t called this Road Tripping for Dummies without reason. We did not have a navigator. We did, in all fairness, have a road map. As a saving grace, I should really neglect to mention the fact that it was probably printed in the 1970s, sepia-ed, torn and quite frankly wrong at times.

6. Count your lucky stars

Perhaps the most important lesson learned is that however much things go wrong, they could be worse. Oddly enough the kindest people we met were at times of (usually motor) mayhem. People are nicer than we give them credit for.

And there you have it, Road Tripping for Dummies. See you on the roads, I’ll be the one in the hired car with the GPS.




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4 Responses to “Road Tripping for Dummies”

@Sadiyya. I am glad you called it “Roadtripping for Dummies”, because you proved yourself to be a dummy.
1. The hired car blew a gasket. Yes that can happen to any car and esspecially a car that has been hired by dummies frequently.
2. The potholes. This is just about the only point I agree with you wholeheartedly. If the roads department use all the money that they spend on “pothole” signs, they can fill a few of these potholes. On the other hand if you did took the opportunity to get of the main road and followed some of the very new side roads (Kokstad to Port St Johns and Coffee Bay and then back to the main road, you would have seen some beautifull places as well as skipped some of these potholes.
3. Learn how to change a tyre. Basic (Then women are fighting for equall rights!!!)
4. Credit Card. As you should know, it is basically impossible to opperate in SA (or elsewhere) without creditcards (visa and master).
5.GPS. With a recent map it is not nesseccary at all and not being able to change a tyre, I doubt whether you would be able to opperate it properly!
6. Count your lucky stars. Well reading from your above experiences, you where indeed lucky to reach Cape Town with a 30+ year road map and yes again I must agree most people in SA and esspecially in the rural areas are extremely nice and helpfull

(Report abuse)

Johannes van Eeden on November 26th, 2009 at 1:58 pm

sounds like an eventful roadtrip!

(Report abuse)

refiloe on November 26th, 2009 at 6:19 pm

@Johannes, no need i already claimed the “dummy” title. Oddly enough, I wouldn’t change a thing.

(Report abuse)

sadiyya sheik on November 27th, 2009 at 12:23 pm

Nice piece. You should extend it to 101 and selfpublish.

Dummies would dig it!!

(Report abuse)

Logan on November 30th, 2009 at 7:55 pm

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Sadiyya is a medical intern, pseudoslave,pathological complainant and only like THE biggest fan of the public health system.
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