Here’s the scenario: you are working in Shanghai and your SA passport is about to expire in a few months. Good, responsible citizen that you are, and not wishing to have trouble with the Chinese authorities when renewing your work visa, you duly go to the SA consulate in Shanghai.
Bureaucratic procedures combined with the Chinese love for paperwork (remember they invented the fabric and love to swim in it, I assure you), the process takes several hours, and there is no one else there, that is to say, no queue. Ja well no fine, such is life. Your passport photos are inadequate for some reason so you go downstairs and across the road to get a fresh set. All your fingers, both palms and full handprints are inked and placed on an official document. The whole paperwork thing really takes a while but ja well no fine so gaan die lewe. You are a Sawth Effricen, so you are as stoic as a bulldog and you can take the punch/jy kan die punch vat. The Chinese official helping you is a nice bloke anyway so you chat about life in Shanghai.
You then pay and wait for the receipt. And wait and wait. Eventually you go back to the cashier window and ask how long is it gonna take to get a receipt. The chap that you rather liked looks at you blankly and says the SA consulate official who has the authority to stamp the receipt is away for a while. It is lunch time so you know exactly what meeting it is that all bureaucrats are extremely disciplined about, so … ja well no fine on that score but why couldn’t the Chinese gentleman at least tell you he had gone to that unbelievably important meeting? You do have other things to do, like go back to work before the boss gets the hell in.
After a brief discussion that turns into a heated debate the official you used to like gives you a receipt without that bliksem stamp but at least you have proof. He thanks you kindly for your understanding and co-operation and further promises to courier a stamped, signed, sealed, framed, kissed or whatever upgrade to your home, but that never arrives. Ja well no fine, all is bureaucratically normal, nothing specific to hak or complain about.
Three months pass and you send a polite email enquiring about your passport, including the three ID numbers you have (SA ID, passport ID — a little different, a caveat to readers — and sommer nog ’n eenetjie you didn’t know about above your passport mug-shot if you remember correctly its whereabouts).
You receive an email a few days later stating nothing has been received but the matter will be followed up, with another “thanking you kindly for your understanding”. Ja well no fine … Then you receive a frightening email a week or so later, bearing in mind you are a foreigner in this country and are required to be legally here. Here, ek se, is the unedited cut and paste except for the italics and the words “you wince”:
“Dear Mr. Mackenzie,
We are still following up with your application with head office these days, however, with no answer yet. According to the passport application registration online, there is no record of any of passport applications of August this year (yours inclusive). Therefore, we assume that they may have lost the whole batch! While awaiting the confirmation from head office, I think it would be more proactive if we courier another set of application to head office . So, we need your cooperation and understanding [you wince] to come to our office again for a new application form and a set of fingerprints along with two passport photos.
Sorry for the inconvenience incurred and looking forward to your kind attention to this matter.
Best Regards! …. ”
Now it’s no longer ja well no fine and so gaan die lewe.
You scratch your head, check your receipt (hell, pity the upgraded, kissed or whatever receipt never arrived) and see the date was 13th July. In quiet desperation you email the oke and say you did it in July, knowing it probably collected dust until the next diplomatic bag / mule with saddle bags / pigeon with collar / whatever, was sent off in August.
Next email:
“Our diplomatic bag goes to South Africa once a month, mostly around 8th of the month. If you applied after that date, application will have to go with the next bag. Thanks for your understanding and co-operation…”
Of course, you are now tired of being thanked for “your copulation co-operation and understanding” and things are no longer ja well no fine. How do you stay legally in the country when either the SA consulate or the relevant section in South Africa are just not doing their job and perhaps blameshifting?
The above was nearly my scenario. Fortunately, I live life on my Irish passport, a wonderful EU first world passport.
Ah, the first world. Let’s compare getting a new passport from the Irish Consulate. When I was living in Southampton, England, my Irish passport had expired and I was living on my SA passport, which I had used to get into the country. Ja well no fine I sent off the expired one with relevant documentation and the fee to the Irish Consulate in London. I got back my new passport about two weeks later. I need say no more.
But now what about all the South Africans in Shanghai and elsewhere in the world who do not have — I am embarrassed to say — what I call a “first world” passport? God help them. God help South Africa, every government department going through corruption and crises from Eskom to Telkom to the Post Office which stole my Christmas and New Year cards to my octogenarian mother last year.
I am not writing this merely as a complaint, but as a concerned citizen and an embarrassed South African.
lucky you, my irish passport is still pending 5 months later …. so really I think it luck and luck only that you got yours so fast, unless they do it quicker if you are in Europe? Try dealing with Department of Home Affairs Jhb, 1 year later and still waiting for birth certificates.
Yes it is ‘challenging’ when you need to admit that your country is something less than ‘first world’ . Its no wonder most concepts of Africa or African in a first world context are an ‘oddity’. But really who cares in the global context – there are 1,000s of ‘western’ based charities – in general attempting to ‘save’ africans from other africans. Only in Africa.
But do hang onto your optimism and most of all your hope, it will improve but not in your lifetime.
It goes much further that that, you should see what we have to put up with in Ireland, see thread below for details:
http://www.jabula.ie/forum/Thread-Very-bad-service
Incidently the charming Ms. Priscilla Jana, South African Ambassador to Ireland, has also invocked diplomatic immunity in a dispute with her domestic help. You would think someone representing their country would at least respect Irish laws and afford their employees due process. It is shameful and unfair that the she is claiming diplomatic immunity and denying her employee a basic right. I’m disgusted and embarassed to be a South African.
Had a quiet chuckle while reading this as it pretty much describes my efforts at getting a new passport while living in Prague. The regular person wasn’t there; they couldn’t find the finger print ink and the passport took 7 months to arrive. It turns out they forgot to put it into the diplomatic bag the first 2 months, and it sat in Pretoria for 2 months after being issued. Since I applied 5 months before the old one expired I was luckily only prevented from travelling for 2 months.
Third World = third class.
Rod, your writing and points would be stronger if you didn’t have so many ‘ja well no fines’ and other rather tedious SEffricanisms those no longer at home seem to feel compelled to overuse. Your situation is regrettably not unique. I have a friend in Saudi who applied for her passport in JUNE, she still doesn’t have it and can’t come back into the country without it. She applied in Pretoria. By contrast I applied at Randburg, no hassles, great service and got it a week later. Pockets of Home Affairs work really well, others are indescribably inefficient.
i know this feeling. homoe affairs is only worried about south africans in south africa. south africans abroad… not really interested. foreigners in south africa… not really interested.
a major, major reason that i’m leaving next year is because i’ve been waiting for nearly 8 months for home affairs to give me a decision about documentation i’ve submitted… and i’m just done. i’ll just sell everything and maybe come back in a couple of years or so for my stepson’s matric year.
stevie wonder: i’ve gotten my visas for several west african countries either on the spot or i’ve gotten a phone call saying “if you can make it here in the next 20 minutes, you can have it today”… as in the same day i put in the paperwork. [living in washington is useful for such things.]
the problem is *south* africa, and not africa in general. god, south africa had me singing and dancing and standing on my head. i was starting to wonder if i had to sell my kids to get the necessary visas, stamps, and permits.
I had a mixed bag in trying to get an urgent travel certificate for my infant son and wife to get back to SA from the UK. Their initial service and reponse was absolutely abysmal, but once I gon on their case in complaining and stressing the urgency I must say they were helpful and efficient, and got me the certificate in 24 hours.
As for my last passport application, nuff said. Ridiculous, especially considering my EU mates get their in under a week.
MY son has waited a year. The consulate in Madrid is this run down office that only sends to SA every two months.
If the bag sent every two months it just shows how little work that have to do for the big wages they are paid.
He asked if the ever use email to SA becuse like you he receives these stupid replies.
Your clearly did not pay the required ‘fee’. If you pay this ‘fee’even Osama Bin Laden can get a SA passport and it only takes a day or two. Get with the system and pay the bribes otherwise nothing gets done! The gravy train is full of passengers so the Home Affairs people have to start their own train. Viva ANC Viva.
Welcome to the real world of home affairs. I never had an SA passport until it was made a law that all people born and living in SA had to enter and leave on a South African passport, so at the age of 50+ I applied and waited for nearly 8 months for a passport. I still travelled in and out on my EU and suffered a lot of abuse at the hands of immigration. I was actually “arrested” and refused travel at OR Tambo and only released when I had my office scan and send to my phone the passport application receipt! We really do live in a Banana Republic. By the same token, my renewed EU passport took exactly 4 days to be sent to me in the UK! (Including the post!)
The lax attitude of home affairs is why Saffricans now need visa’s to visit the UK – every Nigerian and his dog have an SA passport and I’m sure they get them from the vast quantity of “lost” or unposted bags of passports.
The Pinetown home affairs is no better having 2 bribe taking employees fired. We have a worker who only last week had R500 extorted from him to process an ID document
Sorry Chap, It is not only South Africa which has this problem. It is an African epidemic. I would like to hear of just one African country which takes care of its own. I have often wondered why we waste our moneys by having Embassies in these foreign lands. Sometimes one wonders whether areoplanes are carrying these documents or the donkey cart or its sent by bottle service. This could be an interesting topic to discuss at the African Union but alas they tell us they are busy with other (unimportant to you and me) business. God bless the mother continent. And they are the first ones to cry foul when one wants dual citizenship and least you are the luck one.
This is really sad!!! But then again took me 7 months to get my Irish passport….
Everyone’s got a story about Home Affairs. They lost three of our applications for a first ID book. I’m still waiting to see how many duplicated sons I have and whether or not they fit the mould/ replicate the genes
I had no problems with getting a SA passport in Rome five years ago. If I remember correctly, they told me to collect in 3 weeks and it was there.
(Maybe it has gone bad the last few years.)
My German passport takes about 2-months normally.
Y’all have obviously never tried getting a work permit or a dompass – so again lets not put it as an ‘African’ problem because we again get out our me ‘superior’ and Africa ‘inferior’ blinkers. An administrative problem should be seen just as that a problem of lazy incompetant people – Now you will find this in the west too just as you will find corruption -Like bombing countries so you can steal oil and get cheap labour in a form of ‘refugees’
So I agree home affairs sucks-to this day and maybe some embassies – I had a great experience with the SA Embassy in Oslo – NOW SHOULD MY EXPERIENCE BE MADE TO ILLUSTRATE THAT ALL ARE GREAT – no NO no-
Lets fix it speak to the officer being lZY OR MAKE AN OFFICIAL COMPLAIN – DON’T GO OUT AND BLOW IT OUT OF PROPORTION I MEAN REALLY – Unless you are using it as evidence that ‘I TOLD YOU THINGS WILL GO BAD WHEN THE ‘BLACKS’ GOVERN.’
Ayi bakithi asingabi ama-sensationalists unless this is the new Daily Sun ke!
Charlene Smith – and I find your commentary rather garbled and contradictory, never mind you posts. My use of “saffrecinisms” is deliberately tedious.
Had a problem when i lost my passport in Rome a few years ago. The SA embassy was a scary, aggresive experience, coupled with the fact that 9/11 had happened two days prior. Nowadays I travel on my Italian passport, a much more comfortable scenario. But, having dual citizenship, as a SA male is problematic. Apparently we are not allowed dual citizenship. My SA citizenship was revoked when i declared my Italian passport. I had to reapply for my SA passport. Home Affairs says no to dual citizenship (Buthalezi’s legacy), will revoke one’s SA citizenship but will happily reinstate on application. I am living proof of this.
chilipeppa: don’t blame nigerians for this.
south africa used to have a law saying that british citizens can just rock up here and from day 1, they can do everything but vote. the reason that this was rescinded was because home affairs realized that most british citizens don’t live in the uk. [seriously.]
once they realised that there were 15 million nigerians with british passports and 70 million indians with the same… they finally locked the door.
but of course you knew this.
Firephish – fascinating! Thanks for info about Ms Priscilla Jana… yes her domestic worker should absolutely have recourse to Irish law regardless. Using diplomatic immunity is just shirking responsibility. As I am an Irish citizen …. what is it like getting teaching posts in Ireland. I loved my two week trip to Ireland.
Sandra – it sounds like you are applying for an Irish citizenship – it does take a tedious while.
have had 2 dealings with the SA consulate in Hong Kong.
1: Passport renewal – took in everything required, they said 3 months, came in slightly early. Helpful and friendly
2: Find out details of Apostilles and birth registration etc, how to expedite etc – what they didn’t know straight away they promised to find out and phone back, which they did within half an hour. Helpful and friendly once again..
luck of draw maybe, but no faults with them..
So, why do you begrudge Huntley so?
Do you think he would have applied for refugee status, if he had the benefit of an Irish passport?
Imagine you did not have that Irish passport — what would you be saying then?
The Irish are not altogether first world.
After decades of prevarication, I decided to exercise my rights as an Irish citizen, by reason of my father’s birth. Being a “slim maar snoep Saffer”, I read the Instructions on the Irish Consulate Website carefully, gathered all my documents, filled in requisite forms and made a pigrimage from KZN to Pretoria Irish Consulate.
To my absolute horror, behind the counter stood an incredibly grumpy looking head hunted cadre from the RSA Dept of Home Affairs. She distainfully sifted through my laboriously accumulated documentation and arogantly threw them back at me muttering about “incomplete/wrong documents, some of which badly needed to be laminated, as they resemble the dead sea scrolls”
This further galvanised me to get some emergency exit papers from this hell on earth. So I engaged thew services of a very expensive but efficient emmigration courier company.
Six months later, many Rands spent and my passport arrived with a terse note enclosed (probably from the same woman who had rejected my application) “In future we will not accept any documents that have been laminated. I have made a rare and generous exception after suplications from your emigration agents”
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry
I had exasperating issues with the South African Consulate here in London. My South African passport had expired and I was unaware that I needed it if I wanted to travel to SA so I applied for an emergency one a few weeks before my flight to SA. The staff at the consulate were surly and rather unhelpful. They promised me a temporary passport in 14 working days and when the time was up, no one could give me any idea over the phone as to the status of my application. When I phoned once, an officious woman even said ‘listen lady, I don’t have time to talk to you’ huh?? I finally got my temp passport the day before my flight. I then got harrased by border patrol staff in CT before my return flight to London because they said I couldn’t travel on a temp SA passport (which you can if you have dual nationality). The man even threatened to tear up my British passport when I showed it to him! such professional behaviour.
@islander: huh? i don’t think that’s correct anymore. There was some confusion till about 2003, since then, I never had a problem with two passports, either here or in Europe.
Anyway, SA benefits hands down with me having two.
I was recently invited to join my diasporic daughters for a portion of their SE Asia flash packing expedition.
I was advised to check in and out of ORTambo with a RSA passport and then use the Irish passport for its ease of access and first world acceptability elsewhere. On finding, to my horror, that my RSA passport had lapsed, I rushed down to the Piemburg Department of Home Affairs with requisite filled in forms for a speedy renewal
“Sorry baba, we have just changed all the rules for renewal. You have to get a thumbprint verified by Pretoria HQ and only then will your passport be procesed”
This doen’t sound like a train wreck….”How long does this take”, I enquired tremulously
“Haw baba! If your thumbprint isn’t on file, it could take 5-6 weeks” – long after my intended departure date. “Another problem is; everything has to be sent by our new camera to Pretoria, but it is stolen”.
This PC suite was mounted at the entrance to the Passport Aplications public area. One tripped over it on the way in. (presumably to show off). But the camera – installed on Thursday has been stolen by Tuesday, so no applications could be processed at this time.
My courier company again came to my rescue and after a traumatic hour at Umgeni Rd Dept Home Affairs, wheels were set in motion to secure a passport and see me on my way to visit my babies in Asia
I was in Moscow with both of my passports soon to expire and I had a month in which to renew my work permit, so I contacted both embassies. SA told me 3-6 months, $20, UK 1 week, $200 or so. It didn’t occur to me that the SA embassy might use a donkey cart to transport passport applications, I presumed they sent them by freighter – to Cape Town via the Arctic circle takes about a month each way, I believe.
A year or so later I still hadn’t got around to renewing my less useful passport. I approached passport control at OR Tambo with some trepidation (but reasoning that I should be OK since I had one valid passport with the appropriate visa for my destination) and sure enough was taken aside to a little room full of about 30 miscreants like myself where two officials were taking turns to capture everyone’s passport details onto one computer using two fingers each. I came very close to offering to type in my own details. In the end I was let off with an ‘endorsement’ in my expired passport and a stern warning.
@Peter; While dual nationalityis officially condoned, Dept Home Affairs staff riually confiscate any foreign passport presented by a Saffer national. So beware!
When I flew all over SE Asia recently, it was all on my Irish passport. The SA Home Affairs person didn’t even query why there were only two stamps in my RSA passport – out at ORTambo and in at Durban
And they say that anyone who criticizes this sorry public service is a racist!
White refugee – if you are speaking to me, I did NOT “begrudge” Huntley, in fact the blog I wrote about him some time back “Sour grapes: would ALL the Brandon Huntleys stand up” was more in support of him than anything else.