The leader of the Christian Democratic Party, Reverend Theunis Botha, described President Jacob Zuma’s traditional wedding as a “giant step back into the dark ages”. I’m sorry Rev, I know I’m meant to revere you but the only thing from the dark ages in this case are your views on this matter (ducks lightning bolt). As you may or may not know, the president of South Africa, Jacob Gedleyihlekisa Zuma, married again recently. We have also heard that he has also paid lobola (dowry) for another. I don’t understand Botha’s outrage, after all, the church does encourage marriage. And he seems to be pretty successful at this too, of his five marriages so far only one ended in divorce.
In the early 90s when former president Nelson Mandela appeared to live with Graca Machel, Archbishop Desmond Tutu reprimanded him for setting a bad example to young people by not getting married. Mandela famously and jokingly said, “that’s rich coming from a man who wears dresses”. Madiba was cut some slack by a lot of people because he was after all, Madiba. The only person with balls enough to tell him was the Arch. One thing about the Arch is that he has told every single president exactly what he thinks right from the days of apartheid. I have no idea why I’m going on about Tutu, let’s get back on course.
Despite what his detractors say, he is encouraging marriage by getting married so often. Some people are addicted to drugs, alcohol — not our president. He is addicted to marriage. We certainly won’t see a sudden influx of polygamous marriages because of Zuma. No sir. A lot of men are afraid of getting married to just one women, let alone to five.
The first thing I would like to do is to applaud our president for his bravery, he is unfazed by the thought of having multiple mothers-in-law. The thought of even having one has scared me somewhat for a while. Some day I will have to get over this fear. I will request a meeting with the president at some point and ask for advice on women, he certainly seems to know a lot more about them than most. Not only that — he knows them well enough to convince them to agree to share him. That is remarkable.
Since the reverend called the president’s marriage a thing from the dark ages I would like to quote a book that has been around since before the dark ages. The Bible. The Apostle Paul in his letter to Timothy, otherwise known as 1 Timothy 3:2, says to Timothy “an elder should have but one wife” as he instructs him on what a leader of the church should be like. Zuma does not lead a church, he leads a country, and if he led a church I probably wouldn’t be a member.
I have not seen anything in the Bible that actually forbids polygamy. All we have are interpretations of the intentions of certain verses in the Bible to support the pro or anti-polygamy wings. Since there is no specific provision against it I don’t understand why it is now a dark ages concept. I won’t even go into the men who had more than one wife in the Bible, take Jacob and Solomon for example.
I cannot imagine the stamina, he is almost 70 yet he is still getting married. And is expected to add this his bevy of wives. I don’t think I would have the physical stamina to keep up with so many wives, let alone the emotional staying power. In the words of DJ Fresh, “congratulations on your marriage Mr. president, may you have many more!”
Time magazine said that he is the first African president, as if Mandela and Mbeki were not. Simply because they didn’t flaunt their culture as publicly as our current president doesn’t mean they didn’t observe their culture.
Let the president have his wives as long as they are all happy together. Wait a minute, what am I talking about? I’ve been told that a happy marriage is a contradiction. In that case, let the president have his wives and let them be unhappy ever after together.
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36 Responses to “Our president is addicted to marriage”
Polygamy, like group sex and hippy communes, works fine if no-one is “in love”.
As the psychiatrist, Erich Fromm says a man or woman can “love” many, but be “in love” with only one.
Which is where polygamy goes belly up - and probably the reason for female genital mutilation in Northern Africa. A woman is going to be happy the man is with another wife if her clitoris and labia are cut off, and is unlikely to fall “in love”.
If Zuma loves them all equally, he is “in love” with none of them. Which is OK - until one of them is “in love” with him - which appears to have happened with the wife who committed suicide.
Which is why is Zulu culture a man can not marry again unless the existing wives and their families agee. (ask Ma Agnes of Isidingo)
My boyfriend back in the 1960s was keen on a commune - until I agreed and identified a couple where I said I found the man very sexy. It is most peculiar how fast he turned off the idea.
[…] Thought Leader » Khaya Dlanga » Our president is addicted to marriage www.thoughtleader.co.za/khayadlanga/2010/01/07/our-president-is-addicted-to-marriage – view page – cached The leader of the Christian Democratic Party, Reverend Theunis Botha, described President Jacob Zuma’s traditional wedding as a “giant step back into the dark ages”. I’m sorry Rev, I know I’m meant to revere you but the only thing from the dark ages in this case are your views on this matter (ducks lightning bolt). As you may or may not know, the president of South Africa, Jacob… Read moreThe leader of the Christian Democratic Party, Reverend Theunis Botha, described President Jacob Zuma’s traditional wedding as a “giant step back into the dark ages”. I’m sorry Rev, I know I’m meant to revere you but the only thing from the dark ages in this case are your views on this matter (ducks lightning bolt). As you may or may not know, the president of South Africa, Jacob Gedleyihlekisa Zuma, married again recently. We have also heard that he has also paid lobola (dowry) for another. I don’t understand Botha’s outrage, after all, the church does encourage marriage. And he seems to be pretty successful at this too, of his five marriages so far only one ended in divorce. View page […]
Did you actually notice……that the president has been married to this lady for several years already? This last few days was just a traditional ceremony! If memory serves, she has always been one of the three wives that he introduced to the public during the inaugaration.
Our president is addicted to marriage. No our president is addicted to parties!!!!! Nothing to do with marriage. Clebrate and party is Zuma’s motto and stuff the electorate!
Shaka had many wives and many children.
Its a sign of power and virility.
Having many wives and many children shows prosperity.
In our case we the tax payer will be paying for it
by hook or by crook.
Our President has no worries-HAKUNA MATATA
I suppose money talks.
So if there is unrest he just pays (bribes) them.
Money works or perhaps gifts like jewelry with a
bit of gab.Also a BMW or Mercedes.
The mother in law can easily be silenced by a little talk from relatives.
I don’t care whether men in general have one or 20 wives but I am a bit nervous that our president finds so much spare time away from running a country ,to woo all these women
I commend the President for not playing the hypocrite. A lot of leaders have secret wives and mistresses, but he choose to do things right. Jacob Zuma is a true man
My concern is that Pres Zuma is now behaving like
a King Goodwill Zwelithini or King MS Mswati 111, whose predilection for maidens at the Read Dance is only exceeded by by the bloated budget required to maintain their royal households.
If politicians are to take on the trappings of royalty as well as their many other perks, can the RSA fiscus maintain a democratic and OTT royalist hierarchy hegemony simultaneously.
Tradition covered in brutality. I have been thinking about marrying the second wife lately. My wife whom I have been with for a decades suggest that she will like to have another guy too to marry. Is this going to happen in some days to come or I am just paranoid about marriages. Still I did not like those young girls dancing with bare breast. I know it is tradition but online it is soft porn.
The Rev. doesn’t like it because marriage is between a man and a woman.. not between a man and a woman and another woman and another woman and another woman…
What a wonderful president RSA has!He is trying to catch up with Mswati of Swaziland, and even with Sobhuza his father…perhaps! Is it rude to say that all three are “pricks”? JZ had one divorce and indirectly “caused” another wife to commit suicide. In her will, she did not allow him to come to the funeral. Yes and why is there still one younger lady in England fearing to return to RSA? Oh dear RSA….where are you heading for under such enlightened and energetic leadership?
Your piece contains some factual inaccuracies. First, the widespread notion that polygamy, the manner Zuma and others are doing it in the 21st century, ‘is our culture’ is wrong. There is so much historical and anthropological studies that provide some of the key reasons and the manner pre-colonial/pre-capitalist African societies practiced polygamy. Perhaps, you may want to consult some of these. I personally like those studies done from a materialist perspective which contrast the foundations of ‘traditional’ societies and the society we live in now which is founded on the accumulation of material resources. Moreover, Mandela’s joke ‘That is rich coming from a man in a dress’ was made following Tutu’s misgivings regarding the former President’s style of dress, most particularly, his love for the so-called ‘Madiba shirts.’ The comment was NEVER about the president’s relationship with Graca.
People often misunderstand polygamy in Bible times; it was never intended to be like that, but was merely TOLERATED by God. The original intention was for one man and one woman. When, in the New testament, God sent his son, the law was once again made clear that the man could only have one wife. Clearly these rules only apply to people who claim to be Christians. We cannot force these laws on to others.
The only issues I, personally, have with all Zuma’s marriages and children is that 1. we, the taxpayers, have to financially support all this and 2. It perpetuates inequality between men and woman, and I wish my sisters would have some self respect and not sell themselves out like this.
king zwelithimi has a multitudes of wives and supported with taxpayers money now its zuma u have a problem with it…i dnt get wht all the fuss is about its not like we didnt knw that zuma was a polygamist when he became president, sa voted(i personally voted for him) for him knwing full well he paid lobola for two women and a wedding is what usually follows after lobola is paid so i dnt get what the shock is abt!..if those involved are happy and fine with it then who are we to judge!?
Zuma and King Goodwill are both shocking in their complete disregard of where the money comes from to fund their harems.
People say that real men have many wives, it’s a sign of prosperity, etc, etc. Ha! Not when it’s other peoples money being used to fund this. What is so manly about a man who cannot support all his family on his own money?
Tee, if I were a SA I would have problems with my tax money going to take care an old man wives when many people in SA don’t have fresh drinking water, health care, housing or education. These young women are marrying this old man to go up the economic ladder and not because of great love for Zuma. We have this in the US where young women are marrying old men to go up the economic ladder and not for love. A good example of this is Anna Nicole Smith marrying a ninety year old rich man in Texas. He found her in stripe joint and married her, brought her a big house with servants. However, this was private money and not government money he was using so as far as I am concerned, he could marry ten women.
I really like this topic in a sense that people are now beginning to talk specifically about the president’s personal life.Both Dlanga and Traps have done justice on this subject,they have not dissapointed me - CONGRATULATIONS.
My advice to the Bishop and others who disagrees with the President is,it’s ok to express an opinion also try to learn to be tolerant of other people’s cultures and belief.
On the issue of tax payer’s money - we should also accept the reality that president’s and government’s activities are financed trough tax,I personally do not have any problem what so ever who benefifs from the tax we are paying as south africans.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with polygamy, what is wrong is clergy who have decided to vilify the African way of life and are hard at work to impose theirs. The reverend deliberately chose to use the words “dark ages” to assign antiquity to polygamy and this stems from the Darwinian myth of progress and development.
It certainly is not progress for men to consort with a numerous women for the physicl gratification, but it is certainly proper for a man to commit himself to a woman (or women) and build a family, and raise children that can be raised in a balanced home by a father and a mother.
And to gauge our standards by what Paul wrote to some distant tribe is nonsensical. Paul, of all people, is the last man to follow when it comes to these matters as he deliberately falsified the teachings of Jesus. Jesus is on record for saying that “I have not come to change the law”. This law is the law of Moses and that included polygamy. (Remember Kings David and Solomon’s numerous wives?. Then who is Paul to change that law?
Applauding a man who is supposed to be an EXAMPLE to his countrymen who has now bought 6 women -why am I not surprised? Lobola is nothing but a transaction when all the cultural hooha is removed. Half the population would buy 6 wives if the taxpayer would pay for their upkeep! He divorced one (did he give her cows back?) and drove another to suicide, but they keep on coming. I also think that what drives them is the social climbing, certainly not his looks.. He’s also a ‘reverend’ by the way, probably of the HCFC (hypocritical church of fornication and corruption).
Traditionally, heads of state from different countries send official congratulations to other heads of state on their being married. Can anyone tell me which heads of other states sent congratulations to president Zuma and did they send congratulatory messages on all of the occassions of his being married? And if not, why not?
@ngwenya, if one doesn’t like for their personal life to be talked about then that person should not go into public office. The people of SA have a right to talk about how their tax money is spent because it’s their money that maintaining Zuma’s life style. There are many people that don’t have food, drinking water,housing, and education for their children and you see nothing wrong in spending money for Zuma’s wives. I say shame on you this is the way a black African thinks and always trying to blame the white man for their problems.
well khaya ! president zuma is public figure and runs a country,he should lead by example.ive read in your article and i saw names like mandela and mbeki being mentioned and allow me to remind you about de klerk,he also suffers from the same addiction and with all due respect kindly erase mbeki’s name from the list.Mandela dumped one of his early wives like a hot potato for winnie and im sure winnie didn’t see graca coming.At least zuma has a good track record he keeps everyone at home only one was divorced.others have had the bad luck of being dumped before inaugurations hope you catch my grip.zuma is a traditionalist however i believe that deep down inside he knows what is morally right . in closing i believe its not a matter of addiction to marriage but an addiction to things done in marriage !
Bridgeman Ndelemane on January 11th, 2010 at 1:55 pm
Khaya,
Zuma was ordained honorary pastor during his campaign trail…….he is therefore a leader of a church….otherwise he brought the lord’s name into disrepute by getting ordained..
@Jeff,you are really frustrated broer,people who have a different view from yours are not idiot.Please consult your dictionary (that is if you have one) on the word idiot)
@Fergie you have really missed my point completely,this is what I said”I really like this topic in a sense that people are now beginning to talk specifically about the president’s personal life”
What I meant was a dialogue has been opened,we have something to talk about.Is that clearer now Fergie?
Can anyone explain how is tax payers’ money used to support the Zuma household. I thought the guy is employed, irrespective of what we think of his performance on the job. Surely he has the right to arrange his personal life the way he feels as long as he doesn’t break the law. As for setting a bad example, that’s absolute nonsense. I’m told Zuma doesn’t smoke nor drink alcohol, does this mean people will suddenly follow his example? It’s unfortunate that people hide behind false economics to propagate their prejudice. I’m married to one woman and I have no side-squeezer and it suits me fine, but I don’t have a problem with someone marrying many women. Hate Zuma but you can’t honestly say he married timid women after his first wife.
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Khaya Dlanga* By day he perpetuates the evils of capitalism by making consumers feel insecure (he makes ads). For this he has been rewarded with numerous Loerie awards, Cannes Gold, several Eagle awards and a Black Eagle.
Khaya has an ego-crushing bank balance but an ego-boosting 6.5 million views on the popular video-sharing website YouTube.
Africa's top Digital Citizen Journalist in 2008 for innovative use of the internet, at the Highway Africa conference, the largest gathering of African journalists in the world.
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Winner of Financial Mail's Adfocus New Broom award 2009. He has listed these accolades to make you think more highly of him than you ought to.
* The views expressed in this or any future post are not necessarily his own (unless of course you agree with them).
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Polygamy, like group sex and hippy communes, works fine if no-one is “in love”.
As the psychiatrist, Erich Fromm says a man or woman can “love” many, but be “in love” with only one.
Which is where polygamy goes belly up - and probably the reason for female genital mutilation in Northern Africa. A woman is going to be happy the man is with another wife if her clitoris and labia are cut off, and is unlikely to fall “in love”.
If Zuma loves them all equally, he is “in love” with none of them. Which is OK - until one of them is “in love” with him - which appears to have happened with the wife who committed suicide.
Which is why is Zulu culture a man can not marry again unless the existing wives and their families agee. (ask Ma Agnes of Isidingo)
My boyfriend back in the 1960s was keen on a commune - until I agreed and identified a couple where I said I found the man very sexy. It is most peculiar how fast he turned off the idea.
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