Of ten women interviewed in Kenya for a television documentary, the majority of them would rather contract HIV than fall pregnant. Despite being openly promiscuous, and or regularly having unprotected sex, they say that they trust the men that they sleep with. They regularly use the morning after pill (MAP) to avoid becoming pregnant, and do not take any other sexual precautions. Why? They say that the stigma they feel for being pregnant outside of marriage, and the social sanctions that they face are more extreme than those they would face if they were HIV-positive. Their greatest worry is thus that they’ll fall pregnant. That’s because even if you trust your man, he can still make you pregnant, but they seem to believe that trust prevents him from giving you HIV. To avoid exclusion from their families the women in this study take MAP repeatedly, unaware that it loses efficacy the more you take it.
Part of the problem with pregnancy is that it is a visible condition, you can see the body changing and thus it is more difficult to hide than HIV. With ARVs and a healthy lifestyle there are no visible symptoms that a person is HIV-positive. But after four months or so, you’re not going to be able to convince anyone that there’s not a baby inside you.
Why do these women do these things? Stigma.
Stigma is one of the most powerful forces when it comes to sex and sexuality. The idea of being thought of as sexually deviant, dirty or dangerous is something that many people fear, and unfortunately many people describe others with these same life-threatening labels. The fact that these women, and many others across the world are afraid to talk about their sex places them in danger. They are pursuing risky sexual behaviour, with unpredictable consequences.
The commentary on the article has followed a similar line to that which I took when I spoke about masturbation last year. Young girls are scared to talk about sex because parents have effectively forced them to silence. They are too scared to talk about their own sexual safety, and so too scared to practise it. They are more trusting of their pharmacist and sexual partner than of their parents.
So what then do we do to convince these women that there are safer options out there? We start talking to young girls and boys about sexuality. If we don’t talk to them and we let them use public figures and television campaigns as their only source of knowledge about sex we are going to end up in deep trouble.
Kenyan women who are openly promiscuous? What about white women who indulge in orgies, sex-parties, spouse-swapping etc. That is not to mention the fact that the pornography industry is DOMINATED by white people from Western countries. Black people who watch porn (even the “soft” porn that used to air on e-tv) as well as those who don’t know that.
It’s interesting youmentioned the promiscuity of Kenyan women. Most of the research done to “establish” that approx. 30% of African people in Cape Town are involved in concurrent sexual relationship makes you wonder. Which African people. We all know that Africans are in th minority in the Western province and that a great number of Africans who live there are from outside South Africa. Also, AIDS began to spread rapidly following MASS UNCONTROLLED IMMIGRATION by Africans from outside. So who are these promiscuous Africans? Apart from people in KZN who condone promiscuity (sorry, I mean, polygamy), most African-South-Africans frown upon it. You need to do a little reading Jennifer.
All I can say is: You are on Point on this one.
Jennifer only said that the 10 women in the documentary were openly promiscuous…
Isn’t this Zuma saga a proof somehow that Aids is realy not a sexually transmitted disease? or rather it’s not infectious at all? or rather just a mere hoax? How come no one asks themselves such question? Am I that clever? I don’t think so but I smell something in the air though…
ahh Phillipa, I love how you’re always so quick to jump on board, fail to read an article thorougly and viciously dish out criticism. If you have a look at the link, I’m commenting on a study done by other researchers.
This article was an effort to encourage thorough discussion around sexuality to protect the sexual safety of women. It is in no way aimed at saying one group is more sexual than another, simply that we are all sexual people and this must be talked about so that we can have good and safe sex.
Have another read.
Gwen, that’s what I said in my first sentence.
Philippa, While it may be true to say that African people had a taboo about sexual impropriety before the arrival of the colonialists and had ways and means of dealing with it such as impalement, stoning etc I do not think in all honesty that this holds true today. It may be true that the children do not speak to their parents but why is that? It is because westernisation has removed the ability of parents to discipline their children in cases of pregnancy in the customary way. Thanks for the article Jennifer. If the punishment for illicit sex were impalement on discovery believe me that would go a long way towards scaring the hell out of those like our president whobelieve their role is to populate Africa. Is this civilised way to deal with it? Perhaps not, but if a few were made an example of and the rest knew what awaited them it would be a huge deterrent. Of course ideally education should be the answer but unless the consequences fit the pleasurable but forbidden indulgence in sex this will not happen. Despite the veneer of westernisation the women of Africa are still living in a paternalistic society and prostitution is the oldest trade off in the world. A woman’s sexuality in Africa is deemed under customary law to belong to the Head male of the household to do with as he pleases for gain or pleasure. Until women are equal under law nothing will change.
@Lesego. No you are not the only one to wonder whether AIDS is a hoax. Some people say that AIDS stands for American Inspired way to Discourage Sex.
That Zuma appears to have got away with it so far is precisely why there has been such an outcry about it. He is living well and high on the hog unlike the majority of the people out there. KZN has one of the highest rates of HIV infection, did you know that? Women are more susceptible to the disease because of how we are designed as vessels. Men who are circumcised and healthy are thought to have a better chance of avoiding contracting it and prhaps this is why Zuma has been lucky thus far. Perhaps you should ask yourself the question whether you would knowingly have sex with someone who has HIV or AIDS without protection to prove that it’s a hoax? Alternatively, what are young seemingly healthy people dying from apart from Taxi accidents? It is not AIDS which kills them per se but opportunistic diseases like TB, and STD’s which their bodies cannot withstand or something as simple as a cold which becomes pneumonia or bronchitis and is immune to antibiotics which cure those without AIDS who are not too poor to afford medical care. Lifestyle is key and if you engage in risky behaviour sooner or later you pay the price. Why take the risk unless life is not worth living?Perhaps that is the key.
Lesego has a point.