Sport

Liquid Viagra: Comparing descriptions of wines and rugby players

Have you noticed the rugby critics’ poetic descriptions of beefy rugby stars? Yes, those gladiators who are all about to knock the bejesus out of one other in the quest for victory in the new World Cup? Oh, those scholarly sports writers and their strained attempts to create an elegant portrait of yet another testosterone-laden…

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This black life matters

Michael Brown was killed a year ago. They used to say, “It’s been a long, hot summer” but it’s been another long, hot, horror-filled year in the US; every single day another Michael Brown. This is someone I know. In high school, Kadeem was a force in the middle of the field. He owned his…

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Losing in straight sets to the truth about Mandela

Just having tea this morning in Illinois, US, checking out the early rounds at Wimbledon on ESPN, one of the American all-day sports TV channels. Turns out it is 40 years since a black man won Wimbledon for the first and so far the only time — Arthur Ashe in 1975. Yay Arthur. Three of…

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Welcome to The Pollsmoor & Blatter

Welcome everyone. Here at The Pollsmoor & Blatter we pride ourselves on a five-star rating for excellence as depicted in the movie Vyfster available on the movie channel, channel 4, on the in-house entertainment bouquet. Please leave all your personal belongings at the front desk and follow the concierge for personalised his and his bathroom…

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Fifa, Blatter and SA crookery: No surprises

So Sepp Blatter gets the Fifa presidency again at the tender age of 79. He has been president since 1998, far too long to be in power over one of the most powerful, economy-boosting juggernauts the world has ever known. If a country gets the green light to host the World Cup, the payoffs for…

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Ah yes…Jordaan and Africa’s first World Cup…remember that

By Bernadine Jones Fifa has been implicated in a scandal of note — bigger than Giggle-in-Chief ‘s Nkandla apparently. The South African 2010 World Cup tournament was punctuated by euphoria. South Africans forgot their flaws, their divisions, their classifications, and for one brief moment, we really were the rainbow nation, hosting “Africa’s first World Cup”,…

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Proteas, it’s our turn to eat

In Greek mythology, Proteus was a sea god best known for his ability to change his form at will. Proteus’ peculiarity gave birth to the adjective “protean”, which generally means versatility, flexibility, and adaptability. It was based on these characteristics that Swedish botanist, physician and zoologist Carl Linnaeus named a genus of South African flowering…

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South African mediocrity vs Mbalula’s hypocrisy

Sports Minister Fikile Mbalula, the “Razzmatazz” himself, has caused a furore by going off like a dirty bomb at Bafana Bafana. “The two-legged Goats” — as I call them — were brutally booted out of the African Nations Championship (Chan) by the Super Eagles of Naija. This is maybe the gazillionth time that the Goats*…

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Football an undeniable force for positive change

Football mirrors our society. It also has the power to inspire people to achieve. South Africans of all hues support football in one manner or another, from factory workers, to service providers, to children, to neighbours and family members. Due to its global reach and ability to transcend barriers, football is also increasingly used to…

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IOC: Five rings and no balls. Sochi pity!

Excellence. Friendship. Respect. So whose motto is that? Boy Scouts? Alcoholics Anonymous? Who would guess that these are the watchwords supposedly encapsulating the modern Olympic movement? Actually, says the International Olympic Committee (IOC), it’s not merely a slogan, but the organisation’s ‘life philosophy’. Funny thing that, the gap between imagination and reality. While those three…

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