Loading ...So Belle de Jour, the London call girl who blogged anonymously about her salacious exploits, has come out of the lingerie closet — she’s a scientist who needed to pay the bills while writing her thesis.
After being painted with a scarlet tar brush by feminists and morality monitors alike, it turns out that the self-proclaimed “tart” is actually Brooke Magnanti, a medical researcher. It gets better – she researches cancer, in children.
Shew, what a dangerous woman. She’s damn smart and genuinely likes sex. Of course, that’s why she gets criticised. We hear the term “smart and sexy” all the time, but I can count on one hand the number of truly smart and sexy women I know.
Obviously sexiness is completely different to beauty or attractiveness. Think of the alluring ice queen whose seduction technique involves denying a man sex for as long as possible. That’s not sexy, that’s game-playing. It’s effective though. After all, we all want what we can’t have (at least for a while).
Unfortunately men often end up marrying women like this. As if “holding out” is some sign of goodness. “She tried to be good even though she really wanted me. Wow, that’s special.” I call it the Madonna syndrome. Guys: remove your ego from your dick and wake up – she was always going to sleep with you if she really wanted to. It’s just a ploy to get you to commit.
And then there’s the other kind of woman. As Belle de Jour states in her inaugural blog post, “The first thing you should know is that I am a whore”.
The whore doesn’t use sex as a weapon, although she may use it as a tool (like Belle de Jour did to pay the rent). She’s just a woman who enjoys sex and is too independent to waste time trying to “catch” a man by following The Rules handbook. Unlike the Madonna type, she respects and likes men. She understands them.
The Madonna may treat a man reverentially once she has him, but the whore is honest from the start.
That said, both kinds of woman have their faults. And most women are not one or the other but a combination of the two. Still, it’s the “sexy” ones who seem to get more grief – especially if they’re clever enough to write a few best-selling books about it.
To mundundu, a Madonna is not the same thing at all as the Madonna that you mean.
I’m not sure that it follows from a woman being a prostitute that she “genuinely likes sex”.
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